下定义

一直以来很想回顾走过的路，并为自己下定义，现在时间太多，终于做到了，不很详尽，日后想到什么在加加减减。目前，就只有 36 条。

收拾序曲
～～回家之前（三）

面对整室的满目疮痍，我束手无策。但是至少，我已经开始了。很难取舍什么东西要留在伦敦，什么东西要带回岛国，什么东西要扔进垃圾桶里。还有我的很多瓶酒、很多幅画，以及很多旅行的点滴，都不知如何处理。给自己五天的时间收拾九个月累积的有的没的，应该足够吧。

Photos of Chinese New Year 2004 in London uploaded

More photos of Sheffield, Manchester, Old Trafford, Oxford, Belgium, the Netherlands and Germany will be subsequently uploaded.

享受温度
～～回家之前（二）

（还有 7 天）

我实在不知道如何在离开九个月之后，让自己重新适应 35 摄氏度还有湿气 90% 以上的岛国。

我梦见自己在 Changi 入境时会死于呼吸困难导致呼吸管道严重阻塞的一种新型哮喘病。要不，就是中暑死掉。

回家之前，希望能好好享受伦敦 10 到 20 度的柔和，享受在伦敦街头上快步行走也不会流汗的快感。

上天能容许我把伦敦的空气带回岛国那该有多好。

6 月

6 月，回家的季节。
些许的向往，但更多的是害怕和恐惧。
我现在需要的是，
当初离开岛国到达伦敦，
以及独自到德国背包的
勇气。

回到伦敦

飞机在 Stansted 降落，完美的降落，降落时根本不知道飞机已经触碰到陆地。整个机舱的搭客，因此都报以热烈的掌声。我也一样鼓掌，第一次回到伦敦这么开心。或许也是天气的关系吧。


独自出走

独自游走的感觉可遇不可求，自由更是难求，或许以后会再次独自出走。


德国

七天的德国（北部），是另一次的震荡，太多的资讯，太少的时间，我无法完全吸收，需要一点时间消化，消化东德和西德的点点滴滴，尤其是柏林，柏林人（和德国人）太厉害了，我五体投地。


不想

接下来的几天，会游走伦敦（或者英国其他地方）。夏天是旅游的季节，现在，我一点想回家的感觉都没有。

Today

It wasn't your typical gloomy London weather today. It was exceptionally bright and sunny, so much so that I regretted not wearing my sunglasses. I have been looking forward to the sun since ages ago, and now London has given me the sun that I was yearning for. Guess it is the long deprivation of sunlight that made today's sunlight seem so dazzling, that I kept walking under the shades wherever possible. Temperatures have hit an incredibly high of 25 degrees Celsius today, the highest this spring I think. So hot that I sweat along the way and I had to walk into some air-conditioned stores to escape from the heat. For once I thought I was back in Singapore, except that Orchard Road is definitely way shorter than Oxford Street and Bond Street, and the fact that temperatures in Singapore are unquestionably 10 degrees higher than that of London's.

So I was out today in search of "Lonely Planet for Germany" and the latest edition isn't out in stores yet. So I've gotten "The Rough Guide" which looks rather comparable, and two other Lonely Planet travel guidebooks (Greece and Czech & Slovak Republics). Yup, Greece (especially Athens and the Greek Islands including Santorini) and Czech Republic (esp. Prague, Cesky Krumlov and maybe Olomouc) will probably be my next destinations, along with France (esp. Paris, Loire, Nice and Lyon), Southern Italy (esp. Amalfi Coast, Siena and Sicily), Southern Germany (esp. Munich, Heidelberg and the Black Forest), Switzerland (esp. Geneva, Interlaken and Zurich) and Egypt etc. Spain, Portugal, Scandinavia, and the rest of Eastern Europe are off my list right now, but who knows.

Hopefully all goes well in Germany. My first time alone. Bless me.

(Looking forward to 15 degrees at Leipzig tomorrow morning.)

Friends Again

Finished 200+ episodes of "Friends" in three weeks.
Ten series of "Friends".
Ten years of "Friends".
Relationships spanning over ten years, not only ten years, perhaps eternity.
Ross and Rachel - it was a happy ending after all.
How many endings in this world are happy?
Without friends now, laughter is missing in my room at Max Rayne.

完了

完了。真的完了。知道今天的 essays 瞎掰地彻底语无伦次，成绩肯定不会很理想。我不管了，反正今年只占百分之五。明年再说，还是先去满足我旅行的瘾。

End and Begin

Exams will end in 24 hours.
That means, I'm leaving for Germany in 60 hours.
And I've just realised I've done ZERO preparation for the trip as of now.
Research on Germany NOT done.
Itinerary NOT planned.
Currency NOT changed.
Backpack NOT packed.
Everything is NOT done.
An exciting journey by myself is about to begin.

(I guess I'll revise for tomorrow's exam first.)

Electric Dreams

I need some slightly-faster music and some electric dreams now. Remember the mass dances?

Together in Electric Dreams by Human League

I only knew you for a while
I never saw your smile
’til it was time to go
Time to go away (time to go away)
Sometimes it’s hard to recognise
Love comes as a surprise
And it’s too late
It’s just too late to stay
Too late to stay

We`ll always be together
However far it seems
(love never ends)
We`ll always be together
Together in electric dreams

Because the friendship that you gave
Has taught me to be brave
No matter where I go i`ll never find a better prize
(find a better prize)
Though you’re miles and miles away
I see you every day I don’t have to try
I just close my eyes, I close my eyes

We’ll always be together
However far it seems
(love never ends)
We’ll always be together
Together in electric dreams

1429 hrs

现在外头 20 度／又再听林一峰的 "Paris in your eyes"／Moscovici 和 Milgram 在我的面前刚打了一场血腥战／我想跳出窗外／我要出去／可是／我不可以出去

一踏糊涂

今天的 "Memory and Decision" 考试九题选三题，我只读了四个课题。
抓的那四个题目，全部百发百中。
但是，读得太深入，结果，料太多，时间太少。
写得一踏糊涂。

倒数 21
～～回家之前
　　系列之一

其实，并不是很想倒数，只是情不自禁，又再次玩倒数游戏。

还有 21 天，我就要回家了。

我不是很喜欢 21 这个数字。甚至讨厌 21。很巧的，我还是 21岁，22 越逼越近。

现在想写点什么，却发现不知道要写些什么。

离开了整整九个月，九个月不能算长，但是肯定不能算短。

第一次离开这么久。

刚开始，以为把这次的出国等同于当兵的前两个礼拜，心情可能会好受点。但后来发现，这跟当兵完全不一样，至少当兵时，还可以 book out。

刚开始，很是想家，几乎发狂。

后来，慢慢地觉得科技发达，通过互联网追踪岛国新闻，仿佛没有离开过蕞尔岛国。

现在，却恢复离开岛国之前的恐惧。好不容易适应了伦敦的一切，回去之后，又要重新适应，这种滋味并不很好受。

其实，倒数游戏一点都不好玩。但大人总喜欢倒数，凡是脱离不了数字。小王子一语道破地说过：“大人们喜爱数目字。当你告诉他们你交了一位朋友时，他们从不问你重要的问题……只有靠这些数字，他们才会认为对人有了认识。”

很可憎的是，我已经升级到 21 ，成为所谓的大人。

这样看来，玩倒数或许也就情有可原。

浮萍

只因不愿扎根，
才落得一生飘零。

……摘自 XP 的文字选集。

林一峰

很久以前就已经听到这首《我和泡面》，不过当时并不晓得是谁唱的，最近才恍然大悟。

原来，一年前也接触到林一峰的创作，是孙燕姿的《遇见》，现在听了林一峰的 original demo 版本《By My Side》，就觉得孙燕姿唱《遇见》并没有什么大不了。林一峰诠释得比较真吧，下次在这里上载。

现在一直以 repeat mode 听他的床头歌和游乐 Travelogue，听到没有心情面对笔记读书，听到旅行的瘾又在心里头蠢蠢欲动。

没关系，还有七天，我就可以到德国和 Van Gogh 见面。七天。

向往德国多过向往回到那热带岛国。


《我和泡面》　　词曲：林一峰

等待的时光就只有我和你
拿一双筷子期待把你放到嘴里
世界给我几分钟
让你的味道
变成我最美的呼吸
我感觉到时间
感受到真实
每分每秒属于自己
我有个心愿　你到底知不知

等待的日子就只有我和你
开心不开心你最能满足我身体
口袋只有几十块
也能拥有你
给我温暖渡过危机
我忙得没法呼吸
见你总是容易
不管生活高高低低
我有个心愿　你到底知不知

艰难的生活已经成为过去
这一路走来
却一直等待
有谁愿意和我一起分享你
就算有一天一切回到原地

Friends

在两个星期内每天马不停蹄看了六个系列的 Friends ，比读书还用功。在娱乐自己减低考试压力的当儿，不禁想像十年后的自己是否会像戏里的六个主角一样，也有一群可以和自己一起天南地北的 30 岁的 Friends。时光如何地荏苒你我都知道，岁月的不留情是宇宙的定律，已经跨过了 20 的门槛，但是我还是很难相信，30 越靠越近。

日长梦多

清晨五点，天好像早上十点一般亮。
晚上九点，太阳还舍不得下山。
白天愈来愈长，黑夜愈来愈短。
我喜欢这样的日子，
也因此喜欢伦敦的春天，还有春天的伦敦，
能做的东西比较多，但是白日梦也做的特别多。
突然间又萌发去布拉格 (Prague) 的冲动，
想象在布拉格广场听蔡依琳唱她的《布拉格广场》,
想象在一间小咖啡馆看布拉格人的生活作息。
也想到挪威的森林游走，也想看看其他北欧国家 24小时都是白天究竟是怎样一番风景。
还有还有，我更想看到我一直憧憬的北极光。
我又犯了旅行的瘾，就像我的咖啡瘾一样，
没有旅行和咖啡，浑身就会不自在。
有梦总好过没梦吧。
我现在必须泡我的 espresso。

Freud

A month ago, I had an intuition that Freud will come out on today's paper though that psycho has never appeared for the past few years. And indeed, Freud came out today and it was a straight forward testing-your-memory-and-your-speed-of-writing kinda question, and clever me decided to give up on Freud last minute.

So instead of reproducing word for word on Freud's personality theory, I chose to argue why gays are gays and why lesbians are lesbians (the two other essays I wrote were on memory and babies), which weren't that bad, since these are the topics that I studied and they did come out after all.

I guess I should follow my intuitions for the rest of my papers.

Remarkable OreO!

OreO had an astronomy exam today morning, and from the time he received the timetable in March till he stepped into the exam hall this morning, he had always thought the exam commenced at 1030 hrs. So he embarked on the journey from Camden to school at 0930 hrs.

It was 1000 hrs and OreO thought it was still early. So he strolled to the school science library to return a couple of books, before beginning his navigation to the examination hall.

As usual, OreO couldn't find the examination venue instantly and after 20 minutes of searching, at about 1020 hrs, he approached two uncles outside a hall, which looked liked the very examination hall in which there were students inside scribbling furiously and which OreO passed by 5 times while searching leisurely for the exam hall, still thinking that he has 10 more minutes before the exam starts.

Then to his horror, OreO found out from the uncles that the exam had started 25 minutes ago and it was this very hall which he was supposed to be in right now.

Well done, OreO.

5 more minutes and OreO will be barred from the exam and fail this course unit.

OreO then anxiously reported to the chief examiner. The examiner showed OreO to his seat and offered to take his bag and jacket to the storage area.

OreO showed the examiner the required timetable and his ID card in return.

OreO then looked carefully at his timetable and the "1000 hrs" was mocking at him scornfully.

OreO perspired every single drop of sweat that he had stored for the past nine months in London, even though it was ten plus degrees Celsius in the exam hall.

OreO saw lots of stars and planets revolving around his eyes before he could start answering the questions on stars and planets.

How could OreO have thought that it was 1030 hrs all the while?

Nevermind for that question, OreO told himself that he must calm down and start answering the questions.

OreO wiped dry his sweat and took a deep breath and off he scribbled frantically on the answer sheets.

OreO scrawled and scribbled so fast that he finished the exam 45 minutes before the end of the exam.

So OreO double and triple checked every answer he had written, before he decided that he would die of suffocation if he continued to stay in the hall for the next half an hour.

So OreO raised up his right hand and handed in his exam scripts.

OreO strided out of the exam hall while the rest of the candidates were still scrawling.

Well done, OreO.

OreO was so impressed with himself: first, this is the first time in his whole academic life that OreO is late for an exam; second, he arrived 25 minutes late, and then he finished 45 minutes earlier. So OreO in fact spent only 1 hour 20 minutes, instead of the allocated 2 hours 30 minutes to finish the whole exam.

Erm... now OreO is thinking, he should have completed all the questions and sub-questions right?

Whatever, astronomy is his most confident subject. OreO is expecting at least an A for astronomy.

We shall see in a month's time. OreO has four more papers to go.