Thursday, November 27, 2003

It's just amazing how time flies...

Two and a half months have lapsed since I embarked on this journey, and every second in this period of time has been spent orientating myself, adapting myself, and even conditioning myself to a different time zone, to a different lifestyle, to a different climate, to a different environment, to a different culture and to a different state of mind. Most if not all people (including myself before I began this odyssey) would think that at first glance, studying abroad is a glamorous thing... Yes, it is to a certain extent (probably an insignificant extent). But with the fascination and excitement of unknown and uncertainty come inevitably never-ending doubts, fears, questions and problems that seem to haunt and plague me every moment. In this process of continuous self-acclimatisation and self-accommodation, I have learnt to accept individual differences more openly; I have learnt to accept that prejudice and discrimination indeed exist and are unavoidable; I have discovered that the world out there is so dynamic and all along I've been living in this dark abyss; I have realised that there are so much more things awaiting my discovery; I have comprehended that human beings cannot survive alone... we need families and friends; I have reflected upon myself and am continuing to do so.

And along with the thrill of being able to tour around and have fun at the same time, comes the constant reminder of responsibility. Why is it that I've been able to receive education easily without any difficulties, while there are so many people out there trying means and ways to go to school (obviously I am not referring to Singapore though this might apply to a small minority)? Why is it that I'm fortunate enough to be able to come to London? Why is it that a third party that has nothing to do with me is willing to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars and pounds to support my university education and living expenses?

Obviously with all these come expectations and obligations and the duties to perform and excel. The concept of "home" just gets reinforced and strengthened in my soul with every passing day.

After all, I guess that's what studying abroad is all about...

And this brings me to the point that I almost certainly do not understand, for example the logic to why an adolescent deciding to come abroad to study and along with him/her, he/she brings her parents/caretakers/nannies to take care of his/her everyday needs. I do not understand the purpose of people wanting to come to university and on the other hand, wanting to be spoon-fed all the time. I do not understand why people are just concerned with good grades and marks and ignore the rudimentary process of thinking and acquiring knowledge. Are we humans generally just too materialistic and superficial? A friend once told me that if university has failed to make us think, then we have failed to see the purpose of university. In fact, I think many graduates cannot think (not implying that I can think... so, it's time to reflect upon myself again...).

Hmm... what then have we been doing all this while? What is the significance of university then?

No comments: