What’s the point?
I decided to take a break and turned on the TV after reading Brewin’s DR Theory of Posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Coincidentally, Channel 4 was showing the documentary “The Falling Man” on the September 11th tragedy.
“There’s no blood, there’s no guts, it’s just a man falling,” a survivor said in response to Richard Drew’s photograph of the falling man, after which he broke down.
“It was more than grief,” the program described the psychological impact the trauma had on the survivors…
Then everything I had read just flood back… SAM and VAM, HPA axis, amygdala, LeDoux’s findings, flashbacks, EMDR, imaginal rescripting, Foa’s theory… I was surprisingly able to relate all these to the program…
But what’s the point?
I realise I am still extremely frustrated at not being able to do what I really want after finishing my psychology degree.
What’s the point of knowing how to carry out cognitive behaviour therapy? What’s the point of knowing that benzodiazepines can quell some PTSD symptoms? What’s the point of knowing the differences between Type I trauma and Type II trauma? What’s the point?
I feel like giving up…
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"... have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer..."
~Rainer Maria Rilke
Hold on to your dreams and convictions. I'm sure you'll see the light some day. :)
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